I’m in that dark tunnel with no end, no way out. Too many things feel like a catastrophe. I’m walking and walking and walking and there is no way out. It just goes on forever.
My heart is in my throat. And the reason for all this drama … My new psychiatrist told me that I have to give up my current therapist. It’s not an unusual request, but I feel like the bottom just fell out from under me. My therapist has been the one constant I’ve had for the past six years. The only insight I have is that this news along with moving my office at work has sent me spinning. I admit that it does not make sense, and that these seem like insignificant things in the greater scheme of things, especially the office move. But, still, here I am freaked out. Insignificant or not, stupid or not, I am still a wreck.Apparently these things are triggers for me.
I can’t think anymore today. My body is racked with aches from shaking so hard, and crying. I don’t want to be like this, yet here I am. This is a short post because I need to sleep.