Fogged down

The fogginess has kicked me.

I am struggling to remain grounded. The dissociation is persistent and exhausting. All I had to do in order to make dinner was reheat some meat in order to make a pot roast sandwich with leftovers. Even that was too daunting. I would up eating cheese and crackers and an apple for dinner. I must have had the nightmare about the director attacking me again because I woke up yet again with that same leg in pain.

This fog is relentless. I’m trying not to let my brain go to the dark place. It’s like I’m crawling in sand to get home. The effort is that excruciating. All my energy goes to trying to keep it together so that I can work. The rest of the time I am trying to put myself back together again so that I can go back to work with some functionality.

And to think that someone told me today that I “dabble in mental illness.” Hah. They have no idea.

 

5 thoughts on “Fogged down

  1. You’re not alone. Please remember that when the world gets a bit too much. Huge hug and loads of prayers and support. I can’t imagine what it’s like for you but I’ve demons of my own that need slaying and all I know is we need each other at some point along the way. Hang in there, friend.

  2. To get grounded, it was suggested to me to empty the contents of a small lemon juice packet onto my tongue and let it sit there as long as I could stand it. Also, ice packs on the face and back of the neck help. Both tricks have helped many times.

  3. I understand that pressure to try and keep yourself functioning enough to work. i understand how hard it can be. Impossible at times. That is why I lost my job. I couldn’t do it anymore. Thinking of you and sending you lots of strength and love xx

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