The high shelf

English: shelf Ελληνικά: ράφι

High shelves are handy for placing things that should not be misplaced, but also need to be out of mind until you can pay them attention.

Yesterday’s heavy post came out of my session with Doc. Though I have not changed the fundamental thoughts I conveyed yesterday, I do feel better today.

I am exhausted though, as I was not able to fall asleep last night until well after 2 a.m. After I wrote that post I started having a quick succession of thoughts of all the reasons God should not care for me. Not a good way to try to go to sleep.

To top things off, I received an email last night from a friend (supposedly a friend … ) suggesting that I should not be a writer because it’s a lonely life, I am too sensitive, etc. I don’t remember the specifics of the rest, just that he gave a litany of reasons as why I should not write.

Today I’ve set all of that aside, my thoughts about God’s view of me, and my friend’s opinion of me continuing to write. It’s all on a high shelf, and I’ll deal with it later. Today I need to rest, and get ready for more therapy tomorrow. Oh, yeah, and I have a stupid day job for which I have a deadline on a big project project on Friday. So all the emotional crap gets shelved until the weekend.

(Photo credit: Wikipedia)

8 thoughts on “The high shelf

  1. Why don’t friends just let you do what you want to do? I had a friend tell me to stop listening to the music I listened to when I was a teenager because I was just making myself depressed with it… I told her to butt out :/

  2. When I was in a trauma stabilization treatment center, I learned about containmet, which is what you are describing. Now, when I’m at work and get triggered…on a post-It note I write a line or two describing what happened and what I feel, draw a circle around it to contain the problem, then stick it in my pocket. I deal with it when I feel safe at home. It’s a great tool for staying functional on the job. Thanks for reminding me.

  3. You’re not a good writer? Um, hello? I disagree. You are open and warm, and are a voice for PTSD and all of us who have been through it. My background is different from yours, and religion played a part in my whole dealio. My therapist told me to shelve church, and that I didn’t have to deal with it. I had enough on my plate. So I did. Finally, seven years later, I confronted that last piece of the PTSD puzzle, and wrote a legal letter requesting my name be removed from the church records. A lot of people were very upset (family included), but I am who I am. And no one understands how exiting religion played a part in my recovery. But you know what? That’s their problem. Not mine. It was as though a weight was lifted after I worked through that last piece! Sometimes you just have to put some of those difficult emotions on the top shelf to deal with later. You can’t deal with everything all at once. You’re doing a wonderful job, and again, I applaud the openness and the voice you’re giving to PTSD. Regardless how one gets it, the symptoms and recovery process is pretty much the same for all of us. We get it. Every single day, we get it. Please continue writing. I think after this year, you could even turn your blog into an eBook for the Kindle on Amazon, You’re not alone, and your journey may be helping others you don’t even know about. So keep writing!

  4. Pingback: Take stock | A Year in the Life of PTSD

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