Dear Mr. Last Date

flowers

Dear Mr. Last Date,

The yellow and peach roses you gave me on our second date last Sunday are still blooming on my dining room table. I find it ironic that they’ve outlived our dating venture. Today the yellow one is in full beautiful bloom. It still makes me smile every time I see it.

Last night was our last date, and that’s okay. It truly is okay.

Thank you for being candid and straightforward about not wanting to pursue a dating relationship with me. It’s okay that the PTSD is a deal-breaker. I actually kind of knew it was coming. Somehow, I’m not sure exactly how, I assessed that once you learned about my PTSD that we would be done with dating. I figured that with the fact that you have young children, and your OCD that it would not be a fit.

You said you want to be friends, and I hope that does come to fruition, though you can understand my skepticism as I’ve been told this a few times before.

You didn’t get to learn that I also have DID, but that’s just as well. I’ve learned to be incremental in disclosing my issues. I’m glad I did it this way as I might have felt worse if I had told you I had DID, and you dropped me at that point. I’m not sure why, but the rejection with DID is the hardest for me to take. It makes no sense to me that it’s that difficult for me as I understand why that’s usually the deal breaker for most people.

Mostly, I just want to say “thank you” for being kind and honest with me. It seems that those two items are in short supply these days.

I’ve not yet eaten my leftovers from that last date. Tomorrow the flowers will be wilted, the leftovers will be eaten, and that will be that.

Beatriz

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