There are inherent limits with DID.
With DID you watch the world pass you by. On your strongest days you feel like you can do anything, but the feeling is fleeting, and not sustainable.
It was on one of my strongest days that I applied for a promotion in a different office. There may be a job offer tomorrow that I have to turn down.
And I sit here frozen because typing any further renders me teary.
I know the awesomeness of my productivity and skill set is inside me, but the state of my system in the midst of integration renders this as not a good time for this kind of change.
But it angers me because I see others passing me by into other positions that I know I can excel in if my system was more stable.
I don’t want these limits, but they are there nonetheless. No amount of wishing or determination will extricate them out of my system, at least for today.
I trick myself into believing that I can really rock it as a professional, and that I can burst right through the limits that DID imposes on me because I am one hell of a determined woman.
I just want to excel in my career.
But with DID there are limits.